Some mornings, I’m pitching investors on the future of creative technology. Other mornings, I’m locked in deep negotiations with little but wildly passionate stakeholders regarding why a superhero cape, a tutu, and rain boots are not appropriate school attire. Most days, I do both—sometimes before my first coffee.

Being a mother and the CEO of a fast-growing creative tech company is a high-stakes balancing act, equal parts exhilarating and exhausting. It’s managing P&Ls while managing lunchbox preferences that change without notice. It’s leading a global team while leading tiny humans through existential crises, like why bedtime is not a democracy. It’s running a company while running late to soccer practice.

This is not the version of “having it all” that we were promised. It’s louder, messier, harder and sometimes funnier than most dare to admit.

People talk a lot about balance. I don’t believe in balance, there is no balance. There is just life. A never-ending sequence of fires to put out, milestones to hit, and moments to either cherish or miss entirely. But somewhere in the chaos, I’ve realized this relentless juggle has made me better—more decisive, more adaptable, more resilient. Whether it’s a sudden product shift or a preschool meltdown, I have 30 seconds to assess, pivot, and de-escalate before something implodes.

I have rewritten strategy decks during dance class pickup. I have responded to emails while cutting the crust off a sandwich with Michelin-star precision. I have delivered board presentations on two hours of sleep. I have missed family moments for work—and missed work moments for family.

My employees want growth, purpose, and recognition. My children want warmth, love and attention. Either way, I’m on, I’m the cheerleader and core source of keeping morales high.

In both business and parenting, I’m constantly planning for the future while surviving the present—and often doing so without a complete data set. These are the realities of leading at work and at home—the duality of being needed everywhere, all at once.

Meanwhile (as we know) no one is asking dads in leadership how they "balance it all." When I took on the CEO role, I was repeatedly asked—by men who also had children—“How will you manage this with two kids?” My response? “How do you manage it with kids?” Cue awkward silence. Bias exposed. Conversation shifted. Women in leadership walk a tightrope. Too tough? You’re intimidating. Too flexible? You’re not taken seriously. Prioritize work? You’re neglecting your kids. Prioritize your kids? You’re not ambitious enough.

Some days, I am a kickass CEO. Some days, I am just trying to keep everything from catching fire.

I’ve now learned to measure success differently. Did I make one great business decision today? Did I show up for my child in a way that mattered? Did I eat something resembling food? If the answer is yes, that’s a successful day. (If the answer is no, there’s always tomorrow.)

The world doesn’t need more leaders pretending to have it all. It needs more leaders willing to admit that work and life are messy and sometimes held together by caffeine and drive.

To every woman, working mother, caretaker, or anyone balancing the impossible: I’m cheering you on. You got this.

Kate Dohaney

CEO, Orb Group